I was having a nice snooze in the current when I heard about
this; I was abruptly awakened by a noisy magpie squawking about something.
Magpies aren’t often known to eat fish so I stuck my head
out of the water to see what he was fussing about, since I couldn’t sleep
anyway with that inconsiderate racket.
“The humans at the fish museum want a fish to write a blog
post for them to put on the internet!” squawked the magpie as soon as I
surfaced, jumping around on one leg.
I eyed him bemusedly.
“A… what?” I asked. My unusually high intellect wasn’t
working quite as well as usual, just having woken up so rudely and all.
“A blog post! You know, writing about a topic on the
internet!”
“Riiight. And are these weird shenanigans any reason to wake
me up from a most enjoyable rest?”
“I haven’t any idea what you just said but I need to find a
fish to write about science week for the humans!” said the magpie flapping its
wings impatiently. “Hey! You’re a fish, (bright
creature) you can do it!”
“I? I want no dealings with
humans, bloodthirsty creatures!” (No
offence).
“Come on!” Said the magpie, eyeing
off a bug passing by, “you talk good; I bet you’d have lots to say! Besides I
haven’t got all day.” He pounced on the bug and snapped it down. Disgusting.
Although he did have a point, I am
a fish with lots to say. I must admit I have not always admired humans. Most
fish are terrified of humans. I myself have always been slightly nervous of
them. Ordinarily the only time a human wants to see a fish is at lunch time.
Clearly something must be done. Someone must speak out.
So with this in mind I accepted
your offer to discuss various things with you on your ‘blog’. To give fish
everywhere a voice.
Allow me to introduce myself; I am
Augustus.
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